The NFL’s New Super Bowl Rules Are Insane
Well, in case you were still holding out hope that the Super Bowl is anything more than a corporate money grab, let me go ahead and smother that little voice out for ya. At the Super Bowl this year, there will be no: tailgating, taxis, or walking to the stadium.
Now, I know you’re thinking “Shannon, there’s no way in that in AMERICA you cannot tailgate before the biggest football game of the year.” But yes, you did indeed read that right. Al Kelly, the Super Bowl committee CEO, laid down the new rules today.
“You will be allowed to have food in your car and have drink in your car,” Kelly said. “And provided you’re in the boundaries of a single parking space, you’ll be able to eat or drink right next to your car. However, you’re not going to be able to take out a lounge chair, you’re not going to be able to take out a grill, and you’re not going to be able to take up more than one parking space. And it’ll all be watched very carefully.”
“There will be only three ways for the expected 80,000 ticket holders to get to the game. The committee will charter buses called the Fan Express, which will cost $51 and pick up and drop off passengers at nine locations around the region. Fans can also take N.J. Transit to the MetLife Stadium stop or be dropped off by vehicles that must have parking passes.”
“Fans who had considered parking farther from the stadium and getting there on foot will not be allowed to enter.”
So, you can GO CRAZY as long as you’re inside your car, or pressed up against it as you carefully try and avoid stepping over the line like you’re 7 years old and the other parking space is lava. That is, of course, if you’re on of the lucky ones able to get a parking spot. There will be only 13,000 for am estimated 80,000 attendees.
Y’all enjoy that. Ill be on the couch with my life savings intact and a whole living room AND kitchen’s worth of space to drink with my friends.