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EXCLUSIVE: President Obama Has No Game!


There is a nasty rumor that has been circulating around Eugene, Oregon for some time now concerning the legitimacy of President Obama’s skills on the basketball court. Tom Lininger, a professor at the University of Oregon and stone cold defender of domestic violence victims, says that back when he and the President Elect Obama were in Law School together at Harvard, Obama’s game was so nasty he had to cut him from his IM team.

Seriously…Obama was cut from a College Intramural basketball team.

What makes this story even sadder is that Barack didn’t go to law school until he was 27, which basically means he was at his prime playing age at that time. In Obama’s defense, he was probably busy plotting his eventual takeover of the Harvard Law Review and path to the Presidency.

Unless he’s spent the last few years working on his game, it’s safe to say that playing in a pickup game with the President is similar to participating in a card game with The Wire’s Mayor Clarence V. Royce. You better do your best to make the President look legit or else. I wonder what happens to anyone who tries to give Obama buckets or refuses his request when he asks “do ya’ll need one?”

We should have realized that Obomber, his nickname on the court, was no good based on the limited video evidence from his high school days at Punahou, including only one bucket, which came on a breakaway lay-up when Obama’s squad was already up by twenty. Oh yeah and they were playing in Hawaii, which really isn’t known for producing good basketball players.

Much love to Mr. Monday over at BiLB for sharing this story with me during a routine game of lawn darts.



  1. anonymous September 3, 2012

    Also, I’m pretty sure he’s wearing running shoes.


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