Ghettooh: Cuban’s Get Active During Baseball Melee

As you can see, dudes that get hit by pitches in Cuba take that ‘ish seriously. After blatantly getting hit by a pitch, the batter takes off after the pitcher with a baseball bat, while the pitcher does what anybody who doesn’t know karate (or Ka-razy) would have done, broke like the policia was chasing him. I’m surprised that the batter didn’t bing more people with his massive wood (was that gay?) Surely someone will try to blame this (base)brawl on communism or Fidel Castro or both. Via Deadspin

Holler Back: Merlin Olsen Chunks The Deuces

Hall of Famer and Former Rams Legend Merlin Olsen passed away at age 69 Thursday after a battle with mesothelioma (cancer), which is easily one of the worst-sounding diseases known to man. Olsen was diagnosed with the form of lung cancer about a year ago and has kept a low profile in that time. The Utah State graduate, won the Outland Trophy in 1961 and was the Rams’ 3rd overall pick in the 1962 draft. Olsen was apart of the “Fearsome Foursome” the infamous defensive line, that also featured Deacon Jones, Rosey Grier and Lamar Lundy.

A beast in his time, Olsen was known for his compassion on opposing quarterbacks, unlike the original QB Killa Deacon Jones, who was notorious for trying to deliver the wood as a means of exciting his. Olsen gained a greater satisfaction from merely getting the tackle, shutting down the offense and moving on to the next play. In his 15 seasons with the Rams Olsen was selected to 14 Pro Bowls and an was named MVP in 1974. He was selected to the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 1982

Following his football career Olsen took advantage of being a celebrity in Los Angeles, parlaying his success on the gridiron into a solid acting career, teaming with Michael Landon on Little House On The Prairie and eventually getting his own spin-off, Father Murphy. Olsen had a very successful career as a broadcaster working for both NBC and CBS during his days in the booth.

Video of The Fearsome Foursome and Olsen portraying his legendary “Father Murphy” character after the jump…

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Sick Goal: Ronaldo Goes Through Goalie’s Legs

There is a reason that Cristiano Ronaldo is regarded as one of the sickest of all time, besides serving more dimes than the neighborhood dope man, the Real Madrid winger is notorious for scoring some of your more sweeter goals. Wednesday during Real’s Champions League matchup with Lyon, Ronaldo came with this crazy goal, which ended up going through the Goalie’s legs similar to one of those And 1 videos that Footlocker use to give up with reasonable purchase. Unfortunately Lyon came back to tie the game and pull of one the upset to advance to the next round. Either way after watching Ronaldo, all you can say is, “that boy good!”

Guess Who’s Bizzack: Marion Jones Signs With WNBA

After the humiliation of her steroid usage and doing hard time in the clink for lying to federal investigators about juicing and for her participation in check fraud scheme, former track legend Marion Jones is back like cooked crack (as if it ever left) agreeing to a deal with the WNBA’s Tulsa Shock. Jones had previously been training in San Antonio with their WNBA squad, the Silver Stars in hopes of making a return to the sport that she dominated during her college days at North Carolina, winning the Natty in 1994 as the squad’s starting point guard. Now she team up with another former NCAA Champion, with former Arkansas head coach Nolan Richardson serving in the same position with the shock.

Even though the Silver Stars weren’t rolling with Jones she has found a home not too far away and will now train in Tulsa until the WNBA season kicks off in a few months. This is great news for Jones, who served 6 months in prison and was stripped of all her Olympic medals as a result of the steroid scandal. The Shock probably won’t contend for a championship, but it will allow Jones to move on with her life and give her the opportunity to get her shine on professionally in a new sport.

Video of Jones’ introductory press conference with the Shock after the jump…

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Sick Shot: Kobe Hits 6th Game-Winner This Season

Kobe may like to grab other dude’s meats, but that doesn’t mean that he isn’t arguably the clutchest player in NBA history. With each game-winner, Kobe becomes closer to distancing himself from Michael Jordan in this debate. This game-winner couldn’t have come at a better time, as the Lakers were in the midst of a 3-game losing streak, in desperate need of a win to get that proverbial monkey off their back. Kobe came through yet again and prevented a potential disaster.

Sadly even though LeBron James is securing his title as the greatest of all times, he will probably never be regarded at the level of a Jordan and Bryant in terms of being clutch. This is mainly due to the fact that in order to be a clutch player, your team has to be in a close game. King James isn’t in nearly as many close games as Kobe and the Lakers, and even though they win more of them than they lose, it’s never a good sign when it takes a last-second shot to defeat some of your nastier squads in the league.

Break Bread: Eagles Give Vick Roster Bonus

Vick was in Baltimore Tuesday where he received the Ed Block Courage Award as the Eagles selection.

Mike Vick did enough work during his limited action in 2009 for the Eagles to decide to keep him on the roster (at least for now) and pay him a $1.5 million bonus Wednesday. Vick signed a 2-year deal with Philly after getting released from prison last summer and is scheduled to make more than $5 mill this season. Even though the Eagles decided to break bread with the multi-talented quarterback, odds are they will try to move him via trade, most likely for a 2nd round pick or comparable compensation but only if the deal is right.

The Eagles currently have 3 quarterbacks on the roster, with Donovan McNabb remaining the starter after signing an extension last summer that has him under contract through 2010. But with a $6 million roster bonus scheduled to hit on Cinco de Mayo, it wouldn’t be surprising if the Eagles tried to unload D-Mac to save some cheese. It’s a safe bet that between McNabb, Vick and the other solid backup Kevin Kolb, one of these men will not be with the squad come opening kickoff. Vick is the likely choice, considering that he has made it known that he wants to start. But that’s not really up to him and could be tough titty as an old head would say.

It’s baffling that a team with a quarterback deficiency, like say the Rams, would not be willing to part with their 2nd round pick in exchange for one of the most dynamic quarterbacks in NFL history. Vick still has a solid arm, great wheels and a lot left in the tank. Why risk a draft pick on an unproven player when you can have Vick, which would guarantee a boost in attendance and jersey sales.

Lil’ Romeo Drops New Music Video

When he isn’t busy moonlighting as the richest college basketball player in NCAA history, Lil’ Romeo does find time to stick to his day job as a rapper/actor. Since USC is on probation this season anyway and can’t participate in the postseason (may not have made a difference) Romeo decided to hit the studio to record a remix of the Meek Millz “Willy Wonka” track. Romeo is pretty solid on this track and the music video is decent, but it looks like a class project or something you could have found on BET Uncut back in the day.

Meek Millz version after the jump…

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WTF! Did Kobe Try To Grab Matt Barnes’ Meat?

Now I’m not saying that Kobe likes men, but this whole grab other dude’s meat thing has to come to an end. A little over a week after getting caught double-poking Andre Iguodala’s wanker, it appears that Kobe was at it again during his game-long feud with Magic forward Matt Barnes Sunday. The pair went at it all game long, getting in each other’s faces repeatedly and both men went out of their way to deliver a few bumps and courtesy elbows, whilst talking an abundance of heat.

Kobe definitely crossed the line during the 3rd quarter when following a Barnes tip-jam Bryant tried to throw his forearm in the generally direction of Barnes’ nether region. Noticing that Kobe’s arm came a little too close for comfort, Barnes reacts almost instantaneously, thrusting himself in Kobe’s general direction and proceeding to get all up in his grill. At first glance it may have appeared that Barnes flung himself in Kobe’s direction after the dunk to gloat, but the reality is that he was pissed that his manhood was being endangered.

Kobe may have just been putting his arm up to shield himself from Barnes’ landing, but after reviewing the video it looks like he makes a conscious effort to hit Barnes in the balls. This move is becoming far too common for Bryant and needs to be addressed. Coincidentally John Amaechi is sitting somewhere smiling, remembering all the “accidental” meat grabs that he amassed throughout his career. He probably has a woody.

Video of Kobe grabbing yet another dude’s meat, this time it’s teammate Pau Gasol during last year’s Finals, coincidentally against the Magic, after the jump…(Not Safe For Kobe Lovers)

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